As I was driving home from my parent’s home recently, I drove by a truck dealership that was called ‘Big Boys Toys’!

It made me smile because just a couple of days earlier a woman sarcastically had said to me “Men are just boys with bigger toys.” This may be true of some guys, but not all. And, as I am slowly beginning to learn, the purchasing of these ‘big toys’ is often a symptom of something far more significant than what only a surface look leads us to believe about that person.

     You see, it took a long time as a parent for me to understand that I need to spend a whole lot less time focusing on the ‘fruit’ (our kids bad actions, wrong behaviors, poor choices etc.) and much more on the ‘root’ (insecurity, fears, pride, unforgiveness, abuse etc.)

     As I began to learn this, it started to change how I reacted and how I prayed for them…I was even praying ‘wrong’, if there is such a thing!:) Now I ask God to reveal to them the underlying reason for their choices, for the root of their bad attitude, the hidden source of their sinful actions, the origin of their negative outlook etc.

     God is teaching me that although this is a wonderful parenting tool, it is also very good for me too!!! Asking myself “Where in the world did that come from?” when I am saying or doing something unChristlike, helps me to work on the ‘root’ not just the ‘fruit’!

    So, in dealing with your kids actions and attitudes, in your own life or the next time you see ‘Big Boys’ (or ‘Big Girls’, for that matter) with their big wish list or their big toys, be reminded that there is likely some underlying reason other than them just needing to have the biggest and the best of everything

…don’t just look at the ‘fruit’ look for the ‘root’!:)

     Love,

     Karen