As I was driving home the other day I noticed a house that had the best icicles on it that I have ever seen.  You know the kind that are so sparklingly huge, lovely to look at and are all different shapes?  As I continued driving I thought that that is cool to look at on somebody else’s house, but I would not want to own it. The fact that those big icicles are there usually means that the eaves troughs are not functional or non-existent or that the roof is poorly insulated.  Sometimes what appears to be a beautiful thing has underlying ‘ugliness’.

When we were teens growing up we sometimes heard the phrase “Pretty is as pretty does” when we were getting complimented on our appearance. It kind of bugged me at the time but it was a good lesson in humility and helped us to understand that we needed to work on our character more than our looks and outward appearance.

Sometimes as parents we want so much for our kids to ‘make us proud’ we are willing to accept them appearing to have it all together in public rather than pushing them to be real, God-fearing and moral-living kids from the inside out, wherever they are! It is FAR more important that we teach them to live their lives devoted to God and  loving and serving others than to be popular, liked and accepted at any cost. Remember what the Bible teaches “People look on the outward appearance, but God looks on our hearts”

Love,

Karen

Have you ever been to a live production and were amazed by the lead role’s ability to memorize a ton of lines, act smoothly and appear so calm?…Now imagine the guy who lowers the curtain and cleans up backstage coming out and trying to fill that role.  It would be a disaster, for sure!

     As I thought of this in the context of parenting, I began to realize that sometimes we try to take the place of the Lead Role (God) with our kids. We teach them to become dependant on us and not on God. Do we sometimes act like we have the answers and that as long as we are available, God is just needed for ‘emergencies’ only or as their back-up plan?

     If we are in a habit ourselves of living for God and always including Him in all that we do, our kids will see this. They will learn by our example that “…apart from Him, we can do NOTHING”.

     The next time your child comes to you with a hurt, disappointment or disaster, remember to pray with them first before you give your own wisdom and insight. Teach them that God cares even about the smallest details of their lives.

     Have a great week!

     Love,

     Karen

Our daughter was at Wonderland last week and had a great day, with one exception. She said she found it so disturbing how abusive some parents were to their little kids. Some were yelling and swearing at their kids and others were pushing them and yanking them like they were animals.

It always amazes me how some parents think that this behavior is okay because they are the ‘authority’ in their children’s lives. Being a parent, in their minds, somehow gives people permission to overstep God’s laws.

You may not slap your kids around or yell at them constantly but do you spend lots of time with them? Do they get your undivided, fully present attention every day at some point? Neglect, emotional coldness, lack of interest in their lives, withholding affection etc with our kids is just as wrong as physical abuse.

The Ten Commandments are not just Ten Suggestions! Some people seem to stop there and don’t realize that we are not to just follow what God asks us to do, but we are also told to avoid doing what we should NOT do as well!…  And then we need to lead our kids in doing the same thing.

We are told in the Bible to “Not compare ourselves among ourselves” but to compare ourselves to GOD’S standards for life…and we need to get to the place as a parents where we realize that we CANNOT do this on our own but only by asking God to help us do this daily!

Have a wonderful week loving your family!

Love,

Karen

How many of you got ‘the talk’ from one or both of your parents?

How did they do it? Did they hand you books to read or did they sit down and explain sex to you?

So many adults I talk to, that are my age or older, never even got ‘the talk’! I didn’t, but wish I had!

Parents you need to talk to your kids about sex! Forget about your discomfort and start the dialogue. If they don’t want to talk about it, take them for a car ride and lock the doors!!

Start by explaining what will happen at puberty (If you don’t know, then go online and find outJ) Then ask them what they have heard what sex is. If they are older than 10 they likely have heard all the slang terms, so be ready to explain what oral, anal and vaginal sex is in simple terms.

Tell them the very basics, usually by nine years of age, then as time goes on make sure they are knowledgeable about where their value comes from, about pregnancy, diseases, emotional attachment and what healthy relationships look like.

They need to know God’s standard of purity and why He commands it…for their protection and provision.

According to latest studies, your kids’ first source of sexual information is coming from the media, not you, so get in line and make sure that your voices are heard loudly and clearly by them, in the most loving way possible. (AND, be careful what you are allowing them to watch, read and listen to because the media’s influence is huge in their lives as a young person)

Pray lots…

Love,

Karen

With the economy the way it is at present, many people have great concerns about being in debt financially. But when it comes to the ‘debt’ they owe their kids, it sometimes gets put on the back burner until it is too late.
Here are a few things that we, as Dad and Mom, ‘owe’ our kids:

1. We owe it to them to teach them what responsibility means.
2. We need to teach them basic living skills-cooking, cleaning, managing money, personal hygiene etc.. before they leave home.  Or, how about things like taking the time to teach them how to ride a bike, throw/kick a ball, swim, or learn a sport that they enjoy?
3. Teach them to pursue who God made them to be, not what we want them to be.
4. They deserve to be taught at a young age where their value comes from…not from their looks, size, intelligence, athletic ability or money but from who God has made them to be.
5. The mindset that says “Our kids are our ‘slaves’” is so wrong…we need to teach them to serve by our example.
6. Above all, we owe it to them to present Jesus Christ to them in such a way that they are drawn to Him by our lives. We can do our best to do this by living our lives trusting Him completely, praying with them and for them and passionately pursuing the life He has planned for us and them!

Romans 13:8 sums it up well!:
“Don’t run up debts, except for the huge debt of love you owe each other…”

Love your kids by trying to live debt-free with them…you will not regret this choice!

Love,
Karen